My Letter to Michael

It saddens me that I did not keep a copy of the letter that I sent to Michael from the Bachelorette. I will assure you that it was not a sappy celebrity crazed letter that your 13 years old sister might write. It definitely showed off my personality, at least that's what my friends that read it say.
I understand that Michael has a lot of fans. Rightfully so, he is a man with class which has been proven on the show and after the show. I have no fear that Michael will find a lady that he deserves and will care about him more than he could ever imagine. However, as I said, I sent a letter to ABC network that was requesting the ABC "middle man" to forward the letter to Michael. If the mailman and middleman do as I request, I doubt that Michael will be able to easily forget my letter. So this is what I'm expecting to happen...
I understand that Michael voiced his gratitude to all of his fans and promised to respond to all the messages asap. Therefore, I'm sure if I get a response it will be the generic "thank you for your thoughts. You are greatly appreciated. Love Michael" However, he will keep my letter in a box because he can't get me out of his head. Unfortunately, he doesn't know if he is willing to take a risk twice. The bachelorette was hard enough, how could he dream of finding happiness with a random girl that sent him a letter? His friends would convince him that there are plenty of girls in town, NC is too far. But I will always have the satisfaction that I'm the girl Michael will always be thinking of and wondering what if she is the one!

The Suffering Journeyman

My biggest struggle right now in life is asking the question "why am I not suffering?' Sure, life isn't perfect. There are a few things I'm learning to be patient in Christ because I am naturally a greedy person; that somehow I believe I deserve the family and career born in the American dream. However, I have grown to be content in my current state as a single student that has no clear direction in life after school. I could look at the future as an adventure; not always knowing the next step and trusting in God to be faithful. Easier said than done. Too many people try to comfort us 25 years old singles, saying God has us single for a reason, but one day God will bring that special someone. Someone needs to look at those people in the eyes and call them liars. God ordained marriage but he doesn't promise it, no matter how much of a wonderful catch you think I am. This is frustration not suffering!
I struggle with not suffering because people read the Bible and say "If you are not being persecuted for your faith, then you need to pray to God about what sin is keeping you from God. What are you not giving up for God?" Then I look at my life: I'm a 25 years old healthy American single woman, studying graduate level counseling at a seminary, blessed with a godly family, friends, and church. I have a job that is stable. I have a great place to live, great roommate to live with, food on the table (maybe too much) and a car that is just as stubborn as I am when it comes to giving up. I'm free to believe in God, go to church, share my faith, read the Bible, and pray. I've never been threatened or ridiculed for sharing Christ. A pleasant "that's not for me" or fake agreement in the Gospel for the sake of avoiding conflict is the usual response I get from evangelizing. More often than not, people want to hear more, dialogue, or accept Christ. Any suffering that I experience is usually caused by me or the result of a bruised ego. I'm not saying that I am immune to pain and suffering, but my suffering is not for the sake of the gospel like Paul talks about in his letters to Timothy. It bothers me that I am a Christian that lives so comfortably while there are men and women that give it all up for Christ and the message of the gospel.
On my journey, I don't know the next step. I may not one day get that perfect family. I may not live in a big city like I hope. I may be in school for another 10 years because the first 19 years of going to school hasn't made me brilliant enough yet. I may never be ridiculed for my faith. The point I think to all of it is not whether or not I suffer for my faith, but whether or not I am willing to be so obedient to Christ, that even willful suffering will seem like joy because I know it is in love for my Savior. Paul suffered in the temporal sense because he knew the message of the gospel was well worth the end prize. He compares it to a soldier fighting the good fight, a farmer reaping the harvest and an athlete running the good race. It is hard work for all with joy in the end. Maybe I don't see the suffering because I'm consumed with the prize... Christ and Salvation!