Christianity: The Relationship

Shame! I don't know who to shame: the Christians or the world! I'm reluctant to allow either to escape my sorrow at the moment. The other day I began watching a movie called "Saved". I'd never even heard of it before, but I figured the title has a message that either the world should hear or the saints should pray. Not five minutes into the movie did my blood boil. The movie portrays a young population of religious freaks... following rules, going to Jesus camps, choosing the lesser of sins in Jesus' name. One sin saving someone from another sin, instead of allowing God's salvation to be sufficient. It occurred to me that most likely the writer of this script had no clue what Christianity is... love!
Shame the Christians! If the world is somehow confused or misled in the purpose of Christianity, it is the Church's fault for not showing them. We cannot expect the World to understand a relationship they don't believe in. We can't expect love from the World if they don't know true love. We can't expect the World to forgive if the Church is constantly holding grudges. We can't expect the World to abide in laws of the Bible if they are allowed to believe they create their own destiny. We can't expect the World to believe there is hope if the Church looks hopeless. We can't expect the World to sacrifice for others if the best treasure they have is really this World and not something greater in Heaven. We can't expect the World to change if the Church looks like the World.
The world asks for proof of God. Is there some scientific, archaeological remnants from Moses? When was earth created? Prove Jesus is raised from the dead? I'm not a scientist. God has not blessed me with all this knowledge to prove history. All I have to offer is myself as a living sacrifice to God. My relationship with God started eleven years ago by faith. Christianity is a faith based religion, but this does not undermine its reality. My relationship with God is no longer by faith, but by experience. If the World wants proof of God's existence, then let them see me. In the book of Acts in the Bible Jesus said he left the Holy Spirit for us, which is better than Jesus being here because all believers have God with them at all times now interceding on our behalf. Therefore, I always have God with me to show proof. I can love, forgive, have joy, peace, persevere, and hope because I know God is far greater than anything this world will throw at me. Having a relationship with God is the fulfillment to any void in my life prior to this relationship. He is perfect and never lets me down. He is patient with me.
So World I now shame you! God has blessed even you, those who do not believe in Him, with the beauty of this world, with every breath you have been allowed to take, with undeserving love, with marriage and families that is a holy sanction, and with a choice to love Him back. My God is good and does not deserve your slandering. So if you choose not to love Him, that is your choice. However, do not dare lie about God who is pure Truth; leave the lies to Satan, the father of lies. Do not speak of what you do not understand... seek the truth and maybe this religion will transform into a relationship for you too.

Confessions of a Implacabile Christian

I grew up in a home with two godly Christian parents that taught me the value of giving 100% of myself to my commitments. As a child going to church on Sunday (am and pm), Wednesdays and any other scheduled activities during the week involving the church was not an option, it was a part of life. Extracurriculars were only a possibility with the understanding that quiting mid-commitment is not a characteristic of the Core family. School has been my livelihood most of my life, therefore, I should work hard in school as part of my survival; anything beneath my best was not acceptable. Helping others beyond my own egocentric demands was a necessity in becoming a person others would value as a friend. The one aspect I wrongly accuse my parents with fault is my independence. Ironically, this is a virtue I've desired my entire life. My self-confidence is built on the impression that I am self-sufficient and apparently a bit intimidating. I see my boldness of speech as an honorable reflection of my arrogance and incandescent wit. I value the perception of being brave and somewhat quirky. However, recently reality has taken residence in my conscience. None of these characteristics are less desired. I fully take responsibility for my independence as part of who I am. I will not shy from the truth, no matter how painful at times. I do not dare to step down from challenges. I do value admiration, but I desire humility more. I will not ask forgiveness for who I am. However, my confession brings me to my knees as a Christian. I'm proud! I would much rather be "right" in a debate than be right with God. I dare not let anyone know my pain. Asking for help implies I am weak. Sharing struggles admits that I do not know everything.
This past week I have struggled much with what my life would look like depending on different decisions I make. I say I want to go to Seattle (which I really do), but what if I stay here... am I copping out! I say I don't want to be a glorified baby-sitter all my life (which I really don't) but what if I am limiting God in how he wants to use me. I say it is quite okay if I don't find my husband in Raleigh or even for another 30 years for that matter, (which it really is okay), but I would be a liar if I do not admit that I am scared to live life alone. Regardless, I have come to a conclusion. I'm a sinner. God set up a system for us sinners that is a guaranteed success because He is the Creator and Sustainer. I have relentlessly tried to avoid its perks. The Church is an avenue to sanctification God employs for our good. He surrounds me with other people that rely on His strength that will in love shape me into a person that gives 100% to God. All of a sudden my weaknesses develop into a vessel for God to fill because it is no longer about me, but about Him.
No longer do I consider myself independent; I am dependent on God. Now, I am willing, which is brave and safe all at the same time.

Definition of Resolution

I'm not sold on the idea of a resolution. The word gives the connotation of the intentions of doing something rather than the determination better suited for the definition. Thus, resolutions committed at the beginning of a hopeful better year are laid to rest by February. The intentions to make life better gets lost in the shuffle of busy schedules and responsibilities. We don't do the things we are convinced will make us happier because we are too busy being enslaved to the things we think are necessary.
Before I continue I would like to clarify any potential misunderstandings. This is not my promotion to live for the health and wealth happiness that is so deceivingly desirable. Instead, the is an insight to my philosophy of life. I'm semi embarrassed that anyone would call this philosophy Coreism; regardless that philosophy is an extract from my theology which is the study of my God.
Question... how does any of this make sense? Answer: I don't believe in a resolution because I believe in a way of life. The purpose of resolutions are to be a better version of yourself, unfortunately, a better version of a sinner is still just a sinner. Therefore, I need someone perfect, that needs no resolution, to be my life. God has made me a new creation, given me a new beginning. Nothing I do earns this happiness, it is a gift. I can't fail at life and lose it by February because it is an eternal joy. No pressure on my part, I'm a better version of myself everyday because I have Christ.
Therefore, I like challenges. Things to keep life exciting, out of the ordinary, and gives me better opportunities to be bold as my new version. Challenges expect failures at times but in turn stretches, molds, shapes, and encourages success. I will not regret attempting my challenges in 2009, I will grow from them. I see the Bible as a book full of challenges. Love your enemies, finish the race, be slow to speak and quick to listen, Thou shalt not bear false witness, do not gossip...etc. To attempt to keep God's laws is a challenge. We do not fail if we are unable to keep them perfectly because there was nothing for us to earn. Instead, it is an opportunity grow and learn from the attempts to succeed in these challenges.